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why i am a horrible person

1) i was walking up the stairs at the gym today, closely followed by one of "those" girls. you know the kind...blond, tight clothes, a big "tri-delt" written across her chest. i really wasn't planning on doing the elliptical machine, but i hypothesized that she was going to do it, because, really, what else do girls like that do? since i was two steps ahead of her, i signed up for the machine, just so that she and her friend couldn't be together. and i really didn't want to ellipticize in the first place.
2) gabriella and i convinced khalid yesterday that our boss was starting up a new company that specialized in fancy polymers that were specifically used for ass implants.

Comments

Is that the verb for it? Ellipticize?
I have recently taken to ellipticizing. But I am not blond, nor do I wear tight clothes, nor do I own any clothes with Greek letters on them.
You are not a horrible person.