the bottom line is this
why didn't we get up? why did we sit there for 25 minutes? we should have changed cars, but we waited from about sheridan to jarvis before we left. maybe you could call it entertainment, or maybe we were just too drawn in to leave. either way, we sat on the car and watched a drunk crazy man do coin tricks for us, spit all over us, and repeat his mantra of "bottom line is this...never teach your father to make babies".
it took me awhile to understand him, as i think he was speaking a mixture of several languages, english, italian, spanish, and jibberish. we determined that he must have also been crazy because there is no way just a drunk person could act like this. he accused me of being puerto rican several times, told me i was not as pretty as his daughter in law, told me i was very beautiful, and probably told me many other things that i will never understand and more than likely don't want to. his coin tricks consisted of transfering the coin from one hand to another until he lost control and the coin went flying. when he got tired of doing magic tricks for us, he implored me to sing along as he drummed on the seat. giving him a little credit, he was a significantly better musician than he was magician. but in his words, he was not only "the man" but also "the king of kings".
when we looked around and noticed we were the only ones left in the car with him, we decided he was best left alone with talents, and switched cars.