Shokufeh is... home

You're married to a lady?

Today, I learned - or maybe confirmed - that I'm a bad liar. Even if the other person were to believe me... The stress! It's just not worth it!
I had to handle an issue for one of Sam's accounts. I tried weeks ago, but they wouldn't let me, since I'm "not authorized" to do such. That's not what they said when I set up the payments, hmph. So then Sam called. But wasn't totally familiar with the issue so didn't pursue it when they told him there was nothing to worry about. So Sam and I decided the easiest thing to do was for me to call and just say I was him. There's nothing deep about my voice, but little did I guess that they would try to call me on it.
"You're Sam?"
Oh, gosh, she's on to me. Should I just confess and try having Sam call again? No, we already tried the honest route. "Yes."
Later...
"You're not Sam's wife?"
"No."
"Because we have a note here that Sam's wife previously called, but she's not an authorized user."
"I didn't know how to set that up."
"What?" Her tone of voice, she thinks I'm saying I am Sam's wife.
"I didn't know how to make her an authorized user."
"Oh. So you're married to a lady?"
Well, I don't know if I'm a lady, but I am a woman. Maybe I should just hang up and pretend the connection was lost. "Yes."

Despite her challenging my identity, things got sorted out. I guess it was worth the churning stomach.