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March 21, 2008

new...

The Fast has drawn to a close. The new year is upon us. Ahead, we see hopeful opportunities, enticing possibilities, a brighter morning, and more brilliant vistas.

We let go of those things that no longer serve us well, and we embrace new ideas and behaviors in an effort to break new ground and explore unfamiliar parts of ourselves.

Within us there are hopes, wishes and prayers for deeper relationship with each other, stronger connection with our family, and new encounters with souls who have yet to be included in our circles.

Our world cries out for us to redouble our efforts--in small and large ways--to expand our consciousness and compassion and to make choices that will preserve and enhance the beauty that nature has so generously shared with us. We pray our children will enjoy a safe, clean and beautiful existence.

The creative spirit stirs within us, and we heed its call. We dance, sing, paint, write and otherwise express our joy at being alive and fulfilling our soul's purpose.

We are being awakened to a new life.

Happy Naw Ruz.

March 20, 2008

fasting, day 19

At Feast tonight, a young boy offered his seat to me and sat on the floor during devotions. I was so touched! And then I realized... it means I'M OLD!!!!

I was so distraught by this notion that I baked some vegan banana bread AND zucchini bread tonight when I got home. No--you're not crazy. There's no logical correlation. I just felt like baking. And I listened to some good OLD 80s alternative electronica. Gah!

It was not so long ago *I* was the one offering up my seat to my elders out of respect and courtesy. Sitting on the floor has been very familiar and comfortable for me. It seems that I have passed the baton to a new generation of beautiful children and youth who are eager to serve their fellow community members.

I am excited by this prospect. Even if it means I'm old.

That's ok. I'll just put on some Clash, Depeche Mode or Psychedelic Furs and wallow in my agedness. Ha!

March 14, 2008

fasting, day 13

One of the beautiful things about the Fast is how full I feel. Not literally, but emotionally and spiritually.

I am grateful. I have gotten to spend time with family and friends from afar during the Fast.

I feel connected. I have conversation with God every day. All day.

I am meditative and reflective. I have taken myself to account in ways that surprise even me.

I am in the flow. Yoga and meditation have made themselves regular practices in my daily life.

I am surrounded by beauty. I find inspiration and loveliness in the people who walk through my life, the spaces I occupy and all the little things that make my life mine.

It may sound trite, but there is something zen about emptying oneself to discover fullness and offering up ourselves in loving submission to fasting only to receive unforeseen bounties.

Beautiful.

March 08, 2008

fasting, day 7

Traveled yesterday. I am in another world now--one much warmer and sunnier than Nashville! Thank goodness.

I just got off the phone with a dear friend who said something rather ordinary but that deeply resonated for me, I doubt he was aware of the effects of his words. It was simple. It was a reminder that the abstinence from food and drink is simply an outward symbol and practice to help remind us tangibly of the true purpose of the Fast, which is linked with our Obligatory Prayers. That purpose is to bear witness to the divine, ever drawing closer to it out of love and ever drawing further away from our self.

Having just finished reading the book "Beautiful Boy" by David Sheff, I am now ruminating on the meaning of the word self and how we develop an understanding and recognition of what leads to our abasement or loftiness. I don't know that I have much to offer yet except my willingness to be a student and learn whatever I need to about this today.

March 06, 2008

fasting, day 5

sick today. bleh. not happy.

debating whether or not to fast. i don't like being in this position. i know in my heart god accepts my efforts either way. i know that. it's still a dilemma.

what to do...

March 05, 2008

fasting, day 4

I am quiet today. Many emotions swirl above my head.

Sadness. Contentment. Fear. Hope.

I am tired. I will sleep and look toward tomorrow for new opportunities to feel, learn, grow, and be.

March 04, 2008

fasting, day 3

Ok, Kari. I finally did it. Thank you for the tag! It led to quality reflection. I have reworded some of the tag rules to suit some personal preferences of language.

The rule of this tag is to list 6 actions or achievements I think every person needs to accomplish before turning 18. There are no conditions on what can be included on the list. At the end of my post, I am to choose 6 people to get tagged and list their names. People who are tagged write their own blog entry with their 6 suggestions. I need to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, which is pretty smart.

So, here:

1. Conduct a thorough, personal, spiritual search, and choose to make a commitment to a spiritual belief system that will inform and shape your decisions about your life, its purpose and the people who walk your journey with you.

2. Connect with (and practice daily) a physical activity that generates energy, peace of mind, fitness and joy.

3. Learn how to become very comfortable expressing a wide range of human emotion and thought through verbal and written communication. Particularly, learn how to sincerely say, "I love you," "I am sorry," "I need help," and, "I feel angry." And practice the art of handwriting letters to people you love.

4. Become an educated consumer and environmental steward. Be informed about what you purchase and from where/whom. Avoid advertising and marketing. Be considerate and moderate in evaluating what you NEED in life. Reduce your consumption AND your waste and recycle everything you can. Be aware of the space you occupy and the impact you have on people and the world.

5. Be of service to your community and the people in it. Specifically, spend time with people who are different than you and learn about how their experiences in life have shaped who they are. Be of service to the elderly, the poor, children, your neighbors, under-educated or illiterate folks, and people with cognitive or social deficits/disorders.

6. Learn how to manage your money and be responsible for your financial health. Open a savings account and develop the habit of "paying yourself first" each month. Learn how to balance your checkbook. When you apply for that first credit card, do your homework and make smart choices. Find out how to get your free credit report every year and read through it with a detailed eye.

And I'm adding a seventh. Because I can.

7. Read everything you can get your hands on from many different genres--from picture storybooks to 19th century poetry to science fiction. Visit the library often. Develop skill in critical evaluation. Learn how to differentiate between opinion and fact, biased editorializing and objective accounting or reporting. Read books and articles that challenge you to expand your world a little bit more each time.

Go: Andrew, Jeff, Steve, Shokufeh, Mojan, Lacey.

March 03, 2008

fasting, day 2

Yes. Questions. There is a list of them. Here are a few:

What are my greatest strengths?
What are my weaknesses? What do I need to improve?
What are my goals in life? My highest priorities?
What are my dreams in life? The things I'd most like and hope to accomplish?
What are my desires in life--the things that give me pleasure and joy?
How do I spend the majority of my time? My free time?
How do I view money and finances?
How do I envision my perfect home? How do I envision it ten years from now?
How do I envision partnership and marriage?

All leading me to...

What is the purpose of my life?

Sort of an inventory, I suppose. And yes--all quite weighty. But it's time. The Fast is a perfect time to reflect on these core questions I hope we all ask ourselves from time to time.

I don't imagine I will have definitive answers to these queries. That's not the point of the exercise. Rather, I hope to simply reflect on the various pieces of my whole life to assess where I am right now without judgment. And in doing so, perhaps the next few steps toward where-I-want-to-be will be gleaned.

March 02, 2008

fasting, day 1

Here we are, again. I would love to share that I am all spiritually prepared--and otherwise prepared--for the Fast this year, but this is not the case. While I am fasting, and while I enjoy the journey and experience of it, I feel rather... unsure this year. Wandering. Unfocused. Questioning.

And perhaps that is the best way to begin a fast--with questions and an open agenda. So, here we are. Begin.