fantasy island
Sometimes, as I drive to work, I dream about what torturous consequences I would like to inflict upon the myriad drivers who make my morning commute, shall we say, hell. Diabolical? Macabre? Wrong? Perhaps. But it is what it is, so allow me my delusions of grandeur for a moment.
It is clear I have watched *way* too many James Bond movies. For example, after the 5th person cut me off this morning, I imagined two heavily armed machine guns popping up out from the left and right side of my front hood and shooting out the tires of the car in front of me. Then, as I was contending with yet another slow driver in the left lane on the highway, I envisioned having jet propulsion packs flip out from under my back fender, and as I slide my goggles down from my head onto my face and gallantly toss my scarf to one side, the jets would flare and my car would blast right over the 6 cars in front of me, dropping green goo on each car as I fly over.
Road rage? I think not. More like, creative driving. Ha!
Comments
well, i think i will now that i found my way! e-me some time at bcglaw@gmail.com so i can pester you & ask you all those lame "what'cha been doin'" questions that i probably shouldn't subject the rest of the blogoverse too... :)
Posted by: brian guequierre | May 5, 2005 02:51 PM
well... here's quite a blast from the past. (i can't help a good cliche.) how _you_ doin', brian? whazzup? i see the skateboarding has remained a constant over the years. nice to know some things don't change. so happy you stopped by - come again more often!
Posted by: delara | May 5, 2005 12:47 AM
i once shared these commute fantasies... i'd start hearing the old peter gunn theme from spy-hunter and imagine i had that arsenal and could just bump all the bad drivers off the road... then i bought an office that's like three-tenths of a mile from my house... so now i skateboard it in two minutes most days... i'd recommend it for everyone... :)
Posted by: brian guequierre | May 2, 2005 10:47 PM
jetpacks: $1M. goggles: $30. scarf: $23. having my way with the annoying drivers of the world: truly priceless.
and thank you for not pointing out the fact that jetpacks on a car are quite scientifically silly.
Posted by: delara | April 28, 2005 12:28 AM
MY MY this was hilarious, D! I see plenty of responses coming from this post. Surely this is something we all contend with. I just love your creative and funny way of coping! I'd thought of the jetpacks before but the goggles, scarf, and green goo? PRICELESS!
Posted by: george | April 27, 2005 10:46 PM