the disguise doesn't help
Seriously, I am not and likely never again will be a big fan of insults masked as humor. It just isn't funny to me. Perhaps this is because I value straightforwardness and honesty, but I also know who and what I have been earlier in my life and how it affected others in adverse ways. To avoid being cryptic here, let's just say that in my "younger years" (like I'm so friggin' old now) I had a SERIOUS edge to me. One might have said I was difficult to approach, and many did say that they found me to be intimidating, especially at first glance. Perhaps the small and elegant silver skull hanging from my left ear drove them off? Who knows. But I definitely had an edge, and a serious attitude, and I often cloaked negativity and insult in the guise of humor. Let's say it was my survival mechanism for a good long time. So I know what it looks and feels like.
So, when I'm showing you my new Ann Taylor Loft pants in a miniscule houndstooth with cute little pink stripes, don't think you're being funny or clever by saying, "Wow, look at you! Taking a departure from your usual brown and black pants!" And don't think that I think you are complimenting me.
And when someone has planned a perfectly good baby shower and has invited "slightly older than young" family members of the new mother, don't think it's cute or charming to comment on the "geriatric crowd" at the shower.
Not that I think everyone needs to be like Pollyanna all the time - au contraire. Tres boring and trite! But I do believe with all the crap that we have to deal with day in and day out, the last thing I want to hear from my friends is any kind of dig or negativity at the expense of someone else, however subtle or "harmless" the dig might be.
'Nuff said.
Comments
No one bettah mess with my sistah or Tessera dog and I will rent a luxury gaz guzzlah and plow our way from Gotham City before you can finish the Spidah Man theme. Not to mention dats whass goona be playin on da stereo on our way 2 da outer limits of da Windy City.
("Tessera! Come. Pack your bags. We may have to leave on a moments notice.")
Posted by: Marc | July 16, 2004 09:01 PM
you are too cute. the implication was that all my other pants are the same and boring - brown or black. the new ones are super cute though! i was looking for it online, but it's not on their site for some reason. maybe because it's too ugly. haha! anyway, i'll try to take a photo.
Posted by: delara | July 12, 2004 11:15 PM
As a recovering sarcastic person, I hear ya. I sometimes cringe when I think of how I treated people. Some might say I'm not far enough on the road to recovery.
Regarding the pants, did you take offense at the implication that the new pants are not liked or the implication that your other pants are all the same? Is it too straightforward of me to say that your description sounds ugly. But that I'm sure they're not, because I think you have good fashion sense. (Please note, not meant as dig. Meant as compliment, preceded by honesty.)
Posted by: shokufeh | July 12, 2004 10:40 PM